Virginity narratives are often heteronormative (penis-in-vagina as the "real" first time). When writing queer virgins, redefine the milestone. For a lesbian couple, "first time" might be the first time she orgasms with a partner, or the first time she goes down on someone. For a gay male couple, it might be navigating anal sex for the first time without porn as a guide.
Queer virgin storylines are beautiful because they are unscripted. Without the cultural script of "the wedding night," queer couples must invent their own intimacy from scratch. That is inherently romantic. The first time is rarely great sex
The first time is rarely great sex. The 10th time? The 100th time? That is where magic lives. Virgin romantic storylines should not end at the consummation. They should end at the couple, five years later, laughing at how nervous they used to be. Use green (go), yellow (slow down, near a
Use green (go), yellow (slow down, near a boundary), and red (full stop, no questions asked). This is especially useful for virgins who may not know their own limits until they cross them. Use green (go)